In today's dynamic and competitive economy, sales professionals have to build and maintain positive sales relationships despite a widespread global transformation that confronts them daily.
Whether you are new to selling or are an old pro, or whether your product is a high-ticket one-time item or a low-cost consumable, unprecedented shifts in consumer attitudes and purchasing procedures will affect you.
Let us examine the following issues:
1 Why relationships sour
Relationships that generally deteriorate have one or more of the following characteristics in common from one or both parties:
- Hidden or personal agendas,
- Unmanaged big egos,
- Unrealistic and uncommunicated expectations,
- Lack of trust and/or respect,
- Unwillingness to accept differences,
- Greed and/or selfishness,
- Poor communication patterns or behaviour,
- Low ethics or integrity,
- Arrogance or ignorance,
- Inconsistent standards or rules,
- Inflexible or uncompromising attitudes,
- Clouded perceptions, and
- Critical or judgmental behaviour.
The above is quite a list. But I have seen some sales relationships survive even though they have had some or many of the above characteristics.
And I have seen some relationships end abruptly when only one of the traits in the list was present.
2 Sources of conflict
Conflict in relationships is normal. It does not matter whether the relationship is three months or 20 years old.
Some of the sources of conflict in sales relationships are:
- Different personality styles,
- Unrealised expectations,
- Poor follow-through or follow-up,
- Inconsistent messages,
- Assumptions,
- Personal judgments,
- Different communication styles,
- Increased stress levels,
- Short deadlines,
- Individual perceptions,
- Incongruent body language, and
- Perceived faults or shortcomings.
These can be summarised into just two: personal issues and organisational issues.
Everyone is right in his own mind, including his opinion on how a product should be designed, priced or distributed.
Personal issues give people the opportunity to grow, learn, modify or adjust their beliefs or behaviour as they get in touch with their source.
3 Satisfying expectations
Most customers or clients generally want the same things from their vendors or suppliers. They want:
- A fair price,
- Responsiveness to requests and problems,
- A friendly comfortable buying climate,
- Empathy for their needs and wants,
- People who are interested, and
- People who listen.
The secret to anticipating customer needs or problems is quite simple.
It requires paying attention and integrating previous customer experience into your current actions, decisions or behaviour.
The buying public can at times be quite demanding, rude and insensitive.
It is important to realise that the behaviour that people exhibit is often a cover for some other hidden emotional issue or need.
You cannot always make every customer 100 per cent happy all the time. This is an unrealistic expectation on your part.
What you can do is ensure that what you have suggested, recommended, solved or anticipated is reasonable and/or acceptable to them.
4 Modifying behaviour
Conflict is the result of two different points of view.
It can be used as a tool for either or both parties to grow. Or it can be used as a defence against modifying actions, beliefs or behaviour.
Conflict is neutral. What makes it positive or negative is how the source of the conflict (the differences) is managed.
The way to manage conflict is to first look at your own expectations, agendas and definition of what faults are to determine where you are likely to become defensive, critical or judgmental.
You cannot change or manage another person's behaviour.
All you can do is modify your own. You cannot do that until you have a clearer picture of why you tend to react the way you do.
The answer to better managed conflict is not to try and eliminate it. This will never happen. Sooner or later, there will be something else that triggers your negative response.
Learn to see conflict as a teacher - teaching you about you and your tendencies. It takes two people or more to have conflict.
Article by Tim Connor, a US-based management trainer and the author of Soft Sell, a best-selling book on sales. He will be in Singapore on Oct 17 and 18 to present Sales Management Insights From 1000 Successful Companies - How To Lead Your Team To Win. For details, e-mail karen.leong@leadershipco.com or call 9003-7601.
